Debra Reid, mother of Prior's Court alumni Peter, starred in 'The Long Road: Stories of love, hope and autistic young people with complex needs'. These are her thoughts on the making of the film.

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It was with some degree of trepidation that we agreed to work with Prior’s Court and SubMotion Productions to make a film that would eventually become The Long Road.

Motivated by the hope that in so doing we might be able to give something back to the unique provision that changed our family’s life, we signed up. We felt impelled to do so, not least for the sake of other families on the same long road we travel, supporting children requiring special nurturing, whose life’s path is unpredictable, challenging and uncertain.

Day 1 of filming - memories brought back at Prior's Court

We really didn’t know what to expect when we turned up at Prior’s Court on a sunny May morning to meet the film crew. But we needn’t have worried – everyone was friendly, relaxed and welcoming. All we had to do was wander through the lovely grounds at Prior’s Court and talk to other parents while the odd microphone and camera appeared in front of us.

Debra, seated furthest left, chats with (from right), Mark, Matt, Suzanne and David

Perhaps the greatest delight of that day was meeting Zac’s parents for the first time. Talking to Matt and Suzanne brought back many memories of how we felt during Peter’s early days at Prior’s Court – we were so worried about Peter and how his life would pan out. This stress and all the fears we had (and to some extent still have) were now so obviously shared by Matt and Suzanne. But now, looking at their love and commitment to Zac, we were quite overwhelmed. We felt their passion and determination and understood so clearly how they had placed Zac’s needs and wellbeing at the centre of their decision-making, rather than their own feelings and emotions. What a remarkable, beautiful family!

The other partner in the film-making journey was Jenny’s dad, Mark, whom we have known for several years, as Jenny and our son Peter had been at Prior’s Court together and now live in the same new provision in Alfold, Surrey, closer to our families’ homes. Mark, too, is someone we admire. We see the legacy of Jenny’s Prior’s Court days in his own life as he now works tirelessly week in and week out with Peter and Jenny (and other autistic young adults too) at the allotment and bakery (both of which feature in the film).

Our walk around the Prior’s Court grounds, casually chatting together, was followed by an interview to camera, which was a little bit scary to be honest! Spotlights and backdrop screens and microphones and camera lenses all in place, we were asked questions which were sensitively chosen to help us unpack Peter’s story. It is always quite emotional to re-visit Peter’s early journey and the particularly poignant moments where our despair and distress were more prevalent than hope.

But the film crew were empathetic, understanding and appeared genuinely interested. They had done their research well. They demonstrated deep-rooted care and appeared emotionally invested in their endeavours. It was clear they were working to make this film helpful, honest and hopeful. This sense of mission – to educate, encourage and inform – was their priority, and I think this is what has made this film as engaging and inspiring as many people have already told us it has proved to be.

Debra's interview

Day 2 of filming - to Surrey

Following the Prior’s Court filming day, the crew went off to see Peter and Jenny in their work placements at “Mark’s” allotment and at Jubylee Bakes – two inspiring settings which enable Jenny and Peter to utilise and develop skills they learnt at Prior’s Court.

They had enjoyed working at the Prior’s Court bakery and at various garden centres, allotments and gardens in Berkshire during their Prior’s Court days. In some ways these shots at the allotment and Jubylee Bakes encapsulate hopefulness. We see Jenny and Peter engaged in meaningful activities, coping with busy working environments, complying with rules of behaviour, dress and routine - all of which were quite unimaginable achievements when they first arrived at Prior’s Court.

How grateful we are for the many charities and individuals who offer opportunities for our children and young people to thrive and develop and mature and find fulfilment and enjoyment: if only there were more such settings!

We hope all the staff at Prior’s Court who now work in such dedicated ways with the autistic children and young people still in their care are inspired by the shots at the bakery and allotment to keep up the good work. They lay the foundations which make later work placements feasible, and that is such crucial work with far-reaching and long-lasting consequences.

Day 3 of filming - Brighton-bound

The next time we saw the film crew was at Brighton on a Friday night. Richard and Rachel from SubMotion Productions had made the long journey from Norfolk (in horrible weather conditions) to film Peter with us at his normal Friday night location – Brighton Pier.

The first thing that amazed us was the huge smile on Peter’s face when he saw Rachel and Richard. It was clear he had built up a great rapport with them during their visits to the bakery and allotment. They knew exactly how to greet Peter - they were smiley and friendly - and Peter responded by giving them a lovely display of his kite flying skills.

David and Peter at Brighton Pier

For us as a family, these shots with Peter looking so relaxed say it all! You see Peter interacting with us and with relative strangers while being totally relaxed and happy and content. We had been quite apprehensive about this particular filming location – we were aware that the crew had travelled so far to capture these few moments - would it be worth their efforts? We were more than pleasantly surprised. Peter even complied quite unfazed when he was asked to repeat a particular walk and kite flying action so Richard could have a second chance to get an even better shot!

What have we learnt through this experience?

Well, first that a lot of people have contributed positively to Peter’s life through their persistence and patience and skill. Among these are numerous special friends and family members who have shown quite remarkable levels of acceptance and care.

Prior’s Court has made an enormous contribution and our gratitude will truly be lifelong. Indeed, Peter has made lifelong friendships there which was so evident on our recent return for Prior’s Court anniversary celebrations, where that same huge smile, along with handshakes and hugs, spoke volumes about how much he values the people there with whom he has formed relationships.

Second, Peter has come a long way – we are so immensely proud of him and all the loveliness we see in him. He loves to get things right and he loves to please others. He was so delighted when Rachel and Richard told him he had been perfect in his kite flying; he looked so pleased when they thanked him for allowing them to intrude on his normal Brighton routine. Peter, it appears, has defied our early expectations of him: he can now form friendships quickly, shows good understanding of social conventions, and is completely unfazed by cameras and microphones!

Thirdly, we have come a long way as a family. We still have very difficult and challenging times with Peter and we still have our worries about his future, but this particular long journey has many highlights and special moments too.

We feel deeply for Zac’s parents as they anticipate the battles that come once Prior’s Court ends – but we know they, and Zac, will be OK. They are asking all the right questions, they are preparing for the future. We have so much faith in them and know Prior’s Court will be alongside them every step of the way. We are confident that a fruitful future will materialise for Zac – what a unique and special young man he is, full of potential and secure in his family’s love for him.

Finally, we won’t hesitate to help with any further projects like this one – and we encourage you to do the same if the opportunity arises. Giving back a little is the least we can do – and it so happens that we have learnt so much and we ourselves have been encouraged in the process of this particular venture.

Thank you

Thank you to everyone who was involved in seeing this film come to fruition. We hope that every family with young people at Prior’s Court (and in other settings too) will hold onto hope and find strength and courage for the long but strangely rewarding journey ahead.

Our children are worth every effort and opportunity that is invested in them. The sky is really their limit. They can make their own difference to this world, in their own special way.

After all, the world really is a better place when we accept, nurture and celebrate their unique contribution to our families and communities as they blossom into adulthood.

Debra Reid, mother of Prior's Court alumni Peter

Watch The Long Road on YouTube